Weddings, vibrators and food. Oh and Aussie version of Queer Eye..

This is a record for me. I haven't recorded my thoughts this many times in a month since scribbling "Dear Diary, Today I think he noticed me..." into my pink Hello Kitty Diary 20 years ago. I am just bursting with things to say to my laptop right now, in my usual ad-hoc kind of way.

A few items to blog about this lovely balmy Sunday morning.

First on the list: Despite being down in the dumps and making stupid purchases, I spotted something sensible in Myer: the Braun hand held blender (if you ask me it could definitely double as a female pleasure apparatus).

What do you think?

Second item: Weddings. One of my girlfriends is getting married- She is a truly lovely person with a big heart. I'm so happy for her because she's doing it her way, not her parents/inlaw's way.

She is having a crouquembouche!


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Croquembouche recipe from that domestic goddess/white collar criminal: http://www.marthastewart.com

Makes 1
The name of this classic French dessert means "crunch in the mouth." Make the caramel and assemble the dessert as close to serving time as possible.

for pastry puffs
12 tablespoons (1 1/2 sticks) unsalted butter
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon sugar
1 1/2 cups sifted all-purpose flour
7 large eggs

for pastry cream
6 large egg yolks
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup sifted all-purpose flour
2 cups milk
3 tablespoons unsalted butter
2 ounces semisweet chocolate
2 teaspoons instant espresso powder mixed with 2 teaspoons hot water

for caramel
2 cups sugar
2 tablespoons corn syrup

1. Heat oven to 425°. To make the puffs: In a medium saucepan, melt butter in 1 1/2 cups water with salt and sugar. Remove pan from heat, and add flour. Return pan to heat and, using a wooden spoon, beat vigorously for 2 to 3 minutes. (A film should form on the bottom of the pan.) Cool slightly, and add 6 eggs, one at a time, beating vigorously.

2. Make a glaze by beating the remaining egg with 1 teaspoon water, and set aside. Using a pastry bag fitted with a coupler and a 1/2-inch-wide plain tip, pipe out mounds that are 1 inch high and 3/4 inch in diameter on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Brush with egg glaze, and smooth the tops. Bake until puffed and golden, 20 to 25 minutes. Cool on racks. (The puffs can be made ahead and frozen until ready to assemble.)

3. Make the pastry cream: In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, beat egg yolks, gradually adding sugar, until mixture is thick and pale yellow. Beat in flour. Scald milk, and add in dribbles to egg mixture, reserving 1/2 cup. Place mixture in a clean pot over high heat, and stir vigorously until mixture boils and thickens. If it seems too thick to pipe, add reserved milk. Remove from heat. Using a hand whisk, beat butter into egg mixture, one tablespoon at a time.

4. In a double boiler or heat-proof bowl set over simmering water, melt chocolate and espresso together until smooth. Add chocolate mixture to the pastry cream; let cool completely. Just before assembling croquembouche, fill a pastry tube fitted with a 1/4-inch-wide tip with pastry cream, insert tip into puffs, and pipe in cream to fill.

5. To make the caramel: In a medium saucepan, combine 2/3 cup water, sugar, and corn syrup, and bring to a boil over high heat. Do not stir. Cover pan, and boil until steam dissolves any crystals. Uncover, and boil 5 more minutes, or until syrup is amber in color. Remove from heat. Dip the bottom of each puff into the caramel, and arrange puffs in a pyramid.

6. To make a spun-sugar web to wrap around the croquembouche: Cut the looped ends of a wire whisk with wire cutters, or use two forks held side by side, and dip the ends into caramel. Wave the caramel back and forth over the croquembouche, allowing the strands to fall in long, thin threads around it. Wrap any stray strands up and around the croquembouche. Serve.
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I hate weddings, I have hated them ever since my own blasted three-receptions-in-three-hotels-in three-cities-two-countries-travelling-circus-wedding. I needed a holiday after the whole shebang, but I keep all my planning records of the event well preserved.
I had 4 dresses in cream, light pink, ivory and white. Not neccessarily in that order.

Third item: Aussie Queer Eye For The Straight Guy has been announced.
It's exciting because I DO know Brendan.