Down with the dreaded flu

Today, I am very crook.

Going to see the doctor soon. I'm worried about passing this flu onto my baby. She's still so little. Even the nanny looks worried to be in my presence. Worry is the keyword here.

Been too preoccupied to write a blog post of late.
The weather has been sunny and crisp lately so I've been out and about quite a lot. Twittered a lot lately, too though.

Gah. Will twitter kill blogging?

Self-censorship.

Lately, blogging isn't what it used to be.
I used to spew forth all my guts on each post. Let it all hang out. Fun, actually.
That was 5 years ago. I was about to turn 30.

That was a year before I took my MBA hiatus (from blogging and from my life).
When I started blogging again, I was so lost.
BUT during my hiatus from life, I DID change.

I sensor myself a lot more these days. For example, I don't talk about my husband, my marriage or my baby in any sort of depth anymore. I draw a protective boundary around what I hold dearest. Another reason: I deal with issues that come up very efficiently and "file them away" in my mental compactus even before I write a blog post about it.

I've met some people that I have come to respect as fellow bloggers- some who regularly drop by and leave a note and some never comment on the blog but do it via email. Some emails go regrettably unanswered because I wish to remain anonymous.

I talk in abstract most of the time EXCEPT for when other bloggers and events inspire me.
It's sad that blogging (to me, anyway) isn't the creative outlet it used to be.

I think I'm more honest in my Twitter page than I am on the blog because writing a blog post forces you to think about what to write and edit it over and over again. Tweets are just spur-of-the-moment thoughts.

More honest? Twitter vs. Blogs, discuss.

Facebook-induced syndrome.

There should be a name given to all these new social situations that we're put in just because we have Facebook now. A sign of the postmodern world we live in, eh?
Ghosts of the past come out to haunt us. And every one of us has a past we'd rather forget.

Curiousity got the better of me tonight when the wanker-banker husband is working late and I'm working on a few bits and bobs (I've mentioned a start-up on my Twitter, but will blog about it when things become more concrete).

I was the one who went around the internet to dig up what I now realize I wish I didn't know.
Out of a smug feeling, I wanted to feel that I was better off than him, seeing as I have all that I have in my life now. I wanted to find out that he was still unhappily single, old, fat, ugly, poor or better yet, dead. But he looks happy. He's looks like he's got all that he never had when he was a workaholic who spent too much time living it up in Bangsar.

It is now in this moment of weakness that I'll say it's lonely behind this facade.

My life. My choices. Deal with it.