Let me just crap on a bit about marriage.
I met my husband the week after the final semester of our university degrees, at a "Thank God It's All Over!" party. He looked amazing. He's tall, lean but not thin, broad shoulders and he's got strong features for an asian man. His eyes are the prettiest thing about him. Eyes that any asian woman would give their firstborn for. Long eyelashes and big goo-goo eyes. He has a sharp nose and high nose bridge. A cheeky little boy's smile.
In the next six years: We fell in love, we dated for a year, we lived together, he proposed, we got married. We concentrated on our careers. He did a Masters degree, I became a registered architect, he did his CFA exams.
I'm a notoriously negative person, so I want to talk about how hard it is to live together with someone.
You bring totally different values together.
- I was raised very differently from him. I was a rebellious free spirit- one of those spoiled kids driving big cars and unlimited pocket money that you love to hate. My parents were liberal, sometimes absent and raised me with a lot of trust. I turned out OK. Eventually. He was a studious overachiever (but not nerdy) who was responsible, a prefect, a star athlete in school. His parents worshipped the ground he walked on. He turned out OK. I think.
- I always had servants tidying up my room and picking up after me when I was growing up- so you can imagine I am hopeless at keeping a house clean. We live in Australia, so we don't have maids here, mmmkay? Not unless you're willing to pay AUD$20 an hour for a nanny and AUD$40 for a cleaner. My husband is a neat freak who can't stand seeing a layer of dust on anything. He gets frustrated not because he expects a woman to do dusting, vacuuming, cooking and all that shit, but because he has to do it all.
- My husband's mother thinks he's a the messiah, so she raised him to think that he deserves to be worshipped in the same way by the lucky woman he marries. He has a problem when I tell him he's wrong.(Ppppthhfft! That's the sound of surpressed laughter)
- I'm an expressive person who feels confrontation is healthy.
- My husband prefers to remain silent and avoids confrontation.
That's only a few of our problems, but there you go.
Married life ain't all rosy, folks.